8 Reasons Spider Man was NOT a good movie

I am rarely overly critical about movies. There is one general rule of thumb I live by where most real critics would disagree. I never watch movies twice (Footloose being the natural exception to the rule). Spider Man 3 would be the perfect example as to why I have instituted this rule.
Reasons that Spider Man 3 sucked:

1# It was like they had 14 openings to this movie and couldn't decide which one so elected to put all of them in the film.

2# Was this a Hallmark special? I seriously thought I was watching lifetime television for women. It is supposed to be an ACTION HERO movie.

3# Peter Parker was annoyingly goofy the whole movie!!

4# When Harry dies the crying by Kirstin Dunst & Toby Mcguire was some of the worst acting since . . . Let's just say all the old Batman movies.

5# Some more plot development with the black stuff would have been nice!!

6# The ending was so freaking long I kept waiting for them to run out of options and finally do the Scooby Doo ending. (A reference to Wayne's World to make you happy)

7# The one redeeming quality was the scene with a waiter who repeatedly calls Parker 'pecker'. This scene makes the sucks list because I realized that the movie could have been good!

8# The previews before the film to Pirates of the Caribbean set my hopes to high . . . Like for a good movie.
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marko said...

completely agree. and i was annoyed by the scene you mention in #7, because it was such a clear rip-off of steve martin's character in the pink panther.

Joe said...

You know what the movie felt like - it felt like Toby Mcguire and Kristin Dunst didn't want to do the movie, but since they were bound by a contract they acted in the movie anyways. Hence some of the worst acting and script writing I have seen!